Hi 2018… I’m Here & Let’s Chat About A Few Things

January 14, 2018 Musings 2

Ok I know I’ve been AWOL for a bit from the blog but I am still here and I do still read although at the moment it is mainly academic.  *ALL THE SOBS*

I will be finishing my degree at the end of February which will make me the proud owner of a B.S. degree in Business Analysis and Management…  YAY!!!  It also means that at that time I get to have more time to do ALL THE READING and ALL THE POSTING OF THINGS which I look very forward to doing.  Thanks to Boookluvr for posting a bit out here and those who have been patient with me while I complete this.  I will be starting an MBA program in the fall but in between I plan on going to Kinky in Kansas City (March), a local event and RWA (July) where I can spend time around people who love books as much as I do.  If you are at any of these events, look me up!

Now to the ranty portion of this post…

This idea of “clean” romance…

I don’t have an issue with vanilla or softer romances…  I truly don’t and have read/reviewed a few of those over the years but…  DON’T USE “CLEAN” TO DESCRIBE YOUR ROMANCES!!!!!  Sex is not inherently dirty or unclean.  Sex is natural and is not something to be ashamed of writing.  If you don’t want to include it, that’s honestly fine by me but do not use the idea of “clean” to sell your book and keep any respect from me.  If you wrote titles that you now have decided to re-imagine and reissue as “clean” romances then perhaps just perhaps you wrote those stories poorly because if you can easily remove the kink or sex scenes then they weren’t really part of the story in the first place.  You were writing something that  you felt would sell and really did a HUGE disservice to the readers who bought it and enjoyed it as written.  You just proved that the reader should not trust you in the future with their time or money because is the work truly what you wanted to write or was it an attempt at a money-grab with the hottest sub-genre at any given moment?  I now am very skeptical of these authors who have gone down this path and personally have avoided spending money or time on their new stuff.  I get that some authors do rework older titles but to explicitly state that you were reworking to a “clean” or softer romance makes me run away from you as fast as I can.  I also won’t buy or review titles that explicitly market using the “clean” designation so please keep this in mind.  Sweet…  behind closed doors… other things like that won’t cause me to avoid you but “clean” just needs to be retired.

 

Fat Shaming or other types of shaming and blatant bias…

Yeah… There is now a certain author who I will never read again because of certain things that have come to light in reference to her upcoming title and, per trusted members of the romance community, earlier titles with HUGE RED FLAGS… I won’t name the author but here’s the thing…

I’m fat..  I’m not at all skinny and ya know…  I can handle that.

Here’s what the problem is…  I was willing to give this person the benefit of the doubt that perhaps it wasn’t as bad as it seemed.  Yeah, then I saw a person who was reading an ARC and sharing just small snippets of one of the first 5 chapters…  yeah…  damned early in the book and the level of hatred shown towards one of the characters because of her weight was unconscionable.  The fact that some of the thoughts portrayed were supposedly from a friend of the character in question made it painfully apparent that the author is tone-deaf and knowing that she’s been approached by multiple people from readers to bloggers to fellow authors to advocates is maddening.  There are so many reasons for weight issues and not all of them are easy to solve.  The classic eat less, exercise more adage isn’t always the solution and for someone to use a wide platform as this author has to make fat-shaming seem acceptable is not something we should be doing in 2018.

How about instead of using this idea of being fat as something to mock, fear, trash and otherwise put in a horrific light…  we work instead to boost self-esteem and focus on items that are great about a person.  I’d rather have the weight and be a good person than be skinny and produce something that shows how little empathy one has for others.  I’d rather support those who aren’t like me or provide something positive to help others than put them down.  Being fat is not something to be shamed by others… we see enough of that in our daily lives that to see it in the fiction from a writer who is in a genre that should celebrate all shapes and sizes is another blow that many cannot handle.

Let’s work harder to build each other up and be supportive.  Let’s do better dammit…  This is something we need to do period!  We need to seek to understand and embrace the differences rather than put them down or fear them.

Ok…  yeah I know…  I was a bit ranty but I have these moments. 

Anyway…  this year should be fun as I settle out school and reinvigorate the blog with the items I’ve been listening to and reading recently.  Thanks for sticking with me…

2 Responses to “Hi 2018… I’m Here & Let’s Chat About A Few Things”

  1. Lynda aka FishWithSticks

    Name and shame, darling. Name and shame. KRISTAN HIGGINS deserves no anonymity from Romancelandia. She has actively harmed us (skinny or fat or anything in between) by writing such a hateful book, and silence on who it is only protects her.

    I will shout her name and how awful this book is from the fucking rooftops. Everyone should.

  2. Amy Rickman

    I agree on the CLEAN labeling, that ticks me off. I’ve been lucky enough not to have read a book with fat shaming and I have missed the comments over this upcoming release.